I spent much of my life rushing to a finish line that didn’t exist + while missing the journey that did
I was working for my worthiness like it was a thing waiting for me at the end of my never-ending to do list
Earlier this year, my body let me know she was done tolerating what she’d been tolerating (amazingly well!) for so many years
She got sick
My diet had to be completely overhauled, I was in adrenal fatigue + I was realllllll close to walking myself right into an Autoimmune Disease
See, one of my programmed patterns is to fight — push though
If you’re like me, I know you get it
I learned this probably in a similar way you learned it…
By watching + listening to my parents, teachers, leaders + society in general preach the “Work Harder! Do More! Perform Better! Be Stronger! Win at all costs! There’s only ONE seat at the table!” battle cry
But the ones who sacrificed the most…
They never really won or got that seat because the game they were playing was unending – never over
But that didn’t stop me from trying to be the ONE – the winner they spoke about
☝🏻 F * * K T H A T
I could have killed myself and our “perform for your worthiness patriarchal culture” would have stepped right over my dead body + kept on moving
➡️ l needed to learn that I already had that seat I was hoping to earn
➡️ I needed to learn to choose me instead of waiting to be chosen by them
➡️ I needed to learn that getting things done was more important than me doing things
➡️ I needed to learn that collaboration is better than competition
➡️ I needed to learn that a table with only one seat is a table built on fear
➡️ I needed to learn that rest is as — if not more — important than work
➡️ I needed to learn how to slow down
➡️ I needed to learn that it could be safe to slow down + I needed to do the work to make it safe in my body
☝🏻 Those are practices
Those are practices I practice daily + they are practices I share with the entrepreneurial women I coach 
Look, I get it
It’s hard to relax
You feel guilty + lazy because there’s so much you should be + could be doing
And even on those days where you do choose to take it easy you end up feeling worse than you did before you took the day off so you promise yourself you won’t do that again anytime soon
You tell yourself that you’ll rest after this thing is done or after you take care of this one more task, but there’s always one more task
You tell yourself + others that you’re at the bottom of your to do list when the truth is you’re not even on it
I know what you’re afraid of
👉🏻 You’re scared if you stop you won’t start up again
👉🏻 You don’t trust yourself or your body
👉🏻 You’re afraid of losing your edge
It makes sense
After all, this work ethic is why you’re so successful
(or maybe I’m the only one who thought those things + felt that way)
The truth is, my work HAS changed
No longer do I subscribe to the belief that hard work itself makes me intrinsically virtuous or worthy of reward <– as the definition of work ethic explains
AND
That doesn’t mean I don’t work well – I do
Since making these personal transformations…
✅ I’m more productive
✅ I’m more focused
✅ I’m more creative
✅ I’m more inspired
✅ I’m more organized
✅ I’m more fluid
☝🏻 And that’s not all…
✅ I begin my days with me, not with work
✅ My sleep patterns + sleep schedule are more consistent
✅ I have created + upheld boundaries around my time + my calendar
✅ I say “No” without apologizing, guilt + self-shame
✅ I go on weekly dates with my wife
✅ I play with my puppies
✅ I go for walks
✅ I take breaks + naps
✅ I practice yoga
✅ I practice meditation
✅ I have created rituals I use throughout the day that allow me to remain in the present moment
✅ I’ve stopped multi-tasking (as much 😉)
✅ I am doing what I want to do
✅ My body is healthy
Friend, if you’ve got yourself convinced that your unrelenting discipline is serving you, I get it
For years you could not have convinced me otherwise + I have no interest in convincing you, but if you’re tired of feeling exhausted, tense, resentful, stressed out, anxious, secretly out of control while pretending to be in control, overwhelmed + in pain, comment below or send me an email
There’s another way
I promise
xx
